Chapters

The end of a chapter and the beginning of another...

And so I was hooded, I graduated with honors [which is a funny story actually] and I received my diploma. It doesn't get much more official than that. I did it. I finished. That's that. And now it is over, the year is winding down and as I happily said goodbye to 2009 [good riddance] I will send off 2010 with blown kisses of gratitude and admiration. But I'm getting ahead of myself, I'm not talking about the year of 2010, I am talking about the 'tornado-of-a-master-student/intern's-school-year.' It blew in and left pieces scattered: things I've learned in class, things I've learned in my practicum, things I've learned from life experiences and friends...what a year. Yes, what a year, what a stupendous fantastic year. It went by so quickly and it feels as if I only just moved down there. Crazy how fast a year can fly. There really is no wonder how Christmas is already here again and I'm preparing to begin yet another chapter in this life of mine.

There is a certain sense of calm that washed over me a few days after I lost control of my tear ducts and had a melt down. It was a delay from my prayers to heaven, or maybe I just needed a few days to digest everything that was changing.

And so, although I don't feel all that well prepared to set foot in the real world I know that I have the tools to get me there and people that I love backing me up...just as I did upon my move to Oklahoma, just as I always have.

My cup overflow with the gifts I have been given, they just wait to displayed.

I came home a different person than the one that left to move down there. Subtle, but nonetheless changed. And I put part of it to the growing, learning, and developing I did both within and outside of the internship experience. When I look back at the year I see how each day I was there was living. That was life and living it to all the potential it was capable of being. It was the lazy days by the pool basking in the sunlight and absorbing the simplest of pleasures. It was the stops for frozen yogurt or ice cream with the breeze through my hair. It was the time spent with friends doing nothing, doing everything but most importantly doing whatever it was together. It was in the friendships I formed, we met as strangers in January and managed to end up as a tight group of young women ready to conquer the world...or at least play boardgames and dance our troubles away.

Thank you to my fellow interns, for being the wonderful people you are that helped enhance the experience and the memories that I will associate with Oklahoma.

Home

I must admit to you on this cold afternoon in my cold apartment [yes, I still haven't turned on my heat] that I am unsure about how I feel with the impending changes.

I guess I have avoided thinking about it, in fact, I've put thinking about the actuality of it at the very back of my mind. I'm not counting down the days and yet they seem to get closer and closer and closer. It makes me feel good to know people are excited for my return home...Home, what an interesting word. Isn't the apartment I'm sitting in home? Wasn't my dorm room at school home? My childhood houses too, the ones that have since been filled by other families too...they're all home. I suppose wherever Mom and Dad are is home, they are home to me because I am always their child. I am still that girl sitting staring out the window as the rain pours down through the trees in the backyard wondering where my life will take me.

So being that things are soon going to change, boxes will be filled and we'll have another long drive, possibly through another snow storm. A year in Oklahoma, it flew so fast. And I sit here without a doubt in my mind that I will return and see it just as it was, home. Home for a girl who learned she had to be a pseudo adult at some point in time.

This week was a roller coast of emotions. I've gone from being studious to panic stricken to relieved and finally calm. I swear there's a sort of aftershock where things take time to settle out, where my prayers for some sense of clarity and peace make their way from the heavens. And it's at that point I send up a prayer in thanks for sending down the calm I've been aching for.

And so, in my remaining weeks here I've been making Christmas cookies [in hopes of getting rid of food Mom doesn't want me to bring back], staring wide eyed at all the lights, enjoying the weather, enjoying my friends, and finishing up the tasks of being a grad student and intern. I've come to terms with the fact that I also must apply for jobs, yes, I applied for two so far. Still more searching to do to decide where in this fine country I'll be for the next few years.

See you. Love you. Bye

This Is Not Rhetorical

What would happen if I stayed in Oklahoma? If I got a job and got experience?

There is nothing permanent in life, there is nothing set in stone. I can stay for a little while, if I don't like it I can leave. I can move home and leave home. I can move to any state in the country. It's not like I'm held down by anything.

I just have no clue what to do with my life at this very moment.

What would you do?

Gettin' Western In Here

Giving Thanks

Well, Thanksgiving is over. The day is finished and the food has been stuffed into my stomach as far as it would stretch. Successfully, and without complication, the turkey turned out perfectly, no one got hurt [save a slightly burnt pinkie finger from testing the gravy which we made do with pulverized oats, slightly lumpy but not tasting off from what it was intended to be].

This was the first Thanksgiving I'd been away from home and what made it somewhat difficult was knowing my brothers and parents were all together enjoying Mom's staple Thanksgiving items without me. I am sad to say I missed them all and Mom's fruit salad concoction and crust [although, I did make the pie filling well enough]. I'll work on that 'wife/mom' skill at a later date.

That being said, as my two companions and I said what we were thankful for I knew immediately what I wanted to thank God for giving me...or rather what he didn't give; I was thankful for not getting an internship immediately. Without that failure, I'd never have moved to Oklahoma. Then again, if you asked me in December of 2008 what my life would have been like I would have pictured a very different scene. It is safe to say, I am happy with how it is now, and not what I pictured.

In other news [par for the course if you actually read my blabber, there's always other news] I felt compelled to make my way to church today. Yes, I realize it is neither Saturday or Sunday.

There is something so magical about sitting in that big empty church and knowing nothing is going to interfere with my prayers, except for the setting sun streaming through stain glass windows. And oh, how I will miss the architecture of that church dearly.

So here's how all that went down today -

I got ready [which means I showered] to head to church with the intent of getting there with a half hour before the communion service at 5:30. I managed to stumble upon that during my time here in Oklahoma a little while back [that was another time that I just wanted to be alone with God when I found myself in a side chapel full of people waiting for the priest to arrive, but I digress]. I had grabbed my rosary and this day's mysteries to reflect upon the life of Jesus and headed out the door.

I made my way in the silent church. I stopped to light a candle for my future husband and say a quick prayers for my brothers and I often find myself doing and walked to the chapel where others were adoring Christ in his Eucharistic form. Now, I cannot say I fully and completely understand all the things that make the Catholic Church so...Catholic; even after attending parochial schools all my life I find that the Church is full of things I will not completely 'get' [e.g God is one in three persons: I don't quite grasp it...but I still believe]. Being that it is the oldest Christian denomination it has had a lot of time to become saturated with tradition. Now, I'm not here to argue on becoming a Catholic or living like a good Christian. I am neither perfect nor the appropriate person to persuade anyone on the matter. I am simply telling you that there is something comforting about knowing that people, old and young alike, can come together to sit and marvel at how awesome God is. And so, again, I digress.

Like with other times I've attempted to sit in silence with God I found myself sitting with a dozen other people who appeared to be waiting for something to start. Oh, there's an Adoration Shin-dig about to begin and I just happened to get here with the perfect amount of time!?! So much for that rosary just yet.

The priest entered and began. There managed to be an extra sheet of paper to follow along with and I found it to be idiot proof; everything was written out, as if God knew I was going to be a little lost when I sat down.

And can I just make an observation here? There's one thing I don't do well with when it comes to church stuff. Incense can really choke when you're trying to breathe in and sing out. Thankfully I had food in my stomach, otherwise I would have been nauseous. The trials and tribulations of a finicky stomach. Since my hair was still damp the smell of incense has lingered with the smell of grapefruit shampoo even to this time of the night. Oh well, it could smell like far worse things.

So, back to the story. Instead of sitting in silence after the Adoration ended I found myself moving to the other side chapel as the communion service began [thankfully, I knew how all this went down as I'd attended before]. So instead of saying my rosary and reflecting on the Sorrowful Mysteries of Jesus I ended up adoring and consuming him instead. In short, God is in me and I am His vessel: I am the work of His hands and my actions speak [in adoration] for the glory of His name.

Signs

I'm graduating in less than a month, I'll be home in a month. It's a lot of changes all at once. Can we just freeze all this for a little while so I can breathe?

In truth, I'm like so many other people out there. I'm asking God for signs. Not proof of His existence but rather a hint or clue to my next step on this path, this chapter in my life; a sign I'm heading in the right direction before I take the step [or more specifically, before a wrong turn].

Until then...Miss you.Love you.Bye.

Showers vs Tubs

I am a shower person. I have been for as long as I can remember. There is something about the way the water beats against the top of my back and shoulders that feels like a million massages. The hot water gently rolls down my shoulder and off the leg. It clears the mind, cleans the hair, and fills my lungs with the humidity they crave. Showers are wonderful.

I had never cared for baths....until I moved to Oklahoma and I realized baths=childhood.

I have my own bathroom here, no need to share. I'll stopper up the tub and let the shower fall down around me. I can watch the water pool in my stomach and drain as I breathe in and out. I can think and lay silently. I can just be, no time-lines, no deadlines, just me.

I can turn off all the lights and just lay in the hot water in darkness and lose all my sense and focus on what is going through my head, or focus on absolutely nothing. It is peaceful, and it reminds me of The Little Mermaid.

Strange analogy, I realize, but hear me out!

When Ariel first entered my life I was aware of two very distinct things.
1. She had the life and she was ruining it, no matter how cute Prince Eric is, she had it made

-which leads me to point two-

2. She was leaving her dad behind and she was only 16 and married, so not cool. Eric should have just become a merman and Ariel would have had the best life ever...except for the whole legs thing, but if she had a magical father, shouldn't she get legs or fins any time she liked...I mean honestly.

I digress. When I was young and full of wonder at the colors and music I would pretend I was a mermaid. I would put my legs through our diving rings during the summers at the pool and swim around as best I could under the water. I could feel the motion of the water rushing around me in a slow motion sort of sense, everything about it felt calm, relaxing. I could splash around as much as I wanted, drag bubbles down beneath the surface with me and feel as they worked their way from behind my back and gently float upward to the surface. I wanted to badly to be able to hold my breath so I could stay down longer: there was no noise, things were simple and blue, and I was gently rocked back and forth as people swam passed. This was magical, and my love affair with water has not ceased.

So there I am in the tub, the heat is surrounding me and I have the distinct pleasure of plunging my head under the water, feeling my hair gently wrap around me [and it always looks good wet, NEVER a bad hair day under water ;)] and listen to nothing, possibly the muddled sounds of water dripping or my arms swaying on occasion.

Let me break it down for you in the simplest possible way - bath time is like swimming as a child without a care. It is a pleasure and a stress reliever and it is severely under-appreciated by the general population. Since when was being clean just a necessity, savoring it is so much more rewarding...

In other news, did I mention I went to Boston? Oh, yeah, I went to Boston and it was great, an adult extended field trip. You learn some things, you eat some food, you learn some things, you see the sights...mostly you eat the food. And if you're like me you learn about food, you eat food, you plan places where good food is, and then you think about food some more...it was all about the food.

Roots and Wings

It's been awhile...but it's all winding down. That seems a little crazy to me, didn't I just start? Wasn't I just crying in the parking lot at the hospital because I couldn't find my car on the first day [and of course assumed someone hot-wired it to sell it for parts on the black market]? No, apparently I survived mostly unscathed through this year.

It's less than a month now and I'm wondering how a person in my situation should feel. A sort of limbo land has appeared. It was so nice living in the bubble world that I lived in, I wasn't a real adult with a real job, I lived in a safe community, and sustained myself off of fake money that will at some point in the future be paid back. I spent all those years at home making roots and then learned of the benefit of flying - wings to take me on a journey, an adventure. I suppose I'm not quite satiated yet. Isn't there more to do and see here? I know there's more people to become friends with but the days keep slipping past.

Once the bubble is burst I'm not sure where I'll stand. I can't go home and act like my life hasn't drastically changed. It has! I have! But can I stay here and still be satisfied after all the fellow bubble dwellers head on their separate ways as well? I'm not allowing myself the chance and I don't know that it is feasible anyway. Jobs are not as easy to come by here and I have not had time to network my way around. Suddenly, a year master program seems like a very short thing. I guess the only thing to do in this situation is to pray and to pray swiftly.

In other news [as there always is] I was able to see Harry Potter today and it was awesome, just as I was hoping it would be. Also, I attended Club Rodeo. It's a club. It's a rodeo. I have never had dirt flung at me before someone asked me to dance. It is literal and it was fun [except for the smoke....as usual].

Until you read again...sylyb

The End of a Chapter

I have been rather mopey lately.

There is not definitive reason for me to get up. I've put flannel sheets on my bed but still there is a tinge of chill in the apartment; the last thing I want to do is get out of the warm sheets and be productive [that, and I want to see how long it takes before I really need to turn on the heat].

The clocks will fall back next week and then I'll be that much more apt to stay in bed just a little bit longer. Of course, what with the late mornings and evenings turning dark the days are flying by. Truth be told, I don't really know how I feel about it all. I'll be sad to leave but I don't really want to stay after a good portion of my friends move back to their prospective states.

My life has revolved around going to school to make something of myself since I was five. No, I did not have the same drive or purpose that I do now, but I always worked hard on my studies to get good grades, even if that meant procrastinating until Mom told me I could not leave the kitchen table until my math homework was finished [unfortunately, I have always been a bit of a procrastinator].

After graduating with my degree in undergrad the purpose of my life was still to finish up with schooling: to get the internship, to prove myself among other individuals, to do well. That time is nearly coming to an end. I have to finish up my classes and get hooded and I'll be done. Finished. Complete.

I don't feel ready for the real world though. I'm not old enough to have a job, not a real one. The only reason I managed through the jobs I've had since I turned 16 was to survive working them through the summer. I always had a light at the end of the tunnel, an ending, a break from paychecks and taxes. They were simple jobs and I was given just enough responsibility to earn the money I made [no matter how little that was].

In these times of a go-go-go world we work more to spend more, to make money so we can pay back the government for loans we took out, purchases we cannot afford, and things that don't actually make us happy; I sometimes wonder what it would all be like if we stopped chasing the dream of consumerism and started living as simplistically as possible. [Example: If we all just ate healthier and kept our weight within a healthy range there wouldn't be as many issues with heart failure. If we prevented these things from happening we'd be less likely to need solutions.] If we got out and did things with our hands we wouldn't need to pay people to do the work for us. We'd have more time if we realized that work is a means to sustain ourselves, not to get lost and keep away from family.

Just another excuse we put on ourselves to think we'll be happy.

Maybe this is me freaking out, maybe this is just a way for me to put all of my angst on the slippery slope we as Americans are taking with our need for things [that is just another reason I'm excited to do some deep cleaning/purging of 'stuff' when I get back home]. Or maybe, this is a wake up call for me to set my priorities straight before I put down roots [I'm still trying out my wings].

I'm not an adult yet, I've still got places to travel to, experiences to take part in, things to discover. I have plans to follow through with [plans I've yet to dream up] and there's no better time to do it than while I'm still young and mostly worry free. Now, if only I had the money to afford these excursions....You see, I just brought myself full circle on this one. I need a job to do things before I get a job that I want to stick with and put down roots and, well you get the idea.

Here, There, Everywhere

The topics of this post are far from cohesive. In fact, I'll likely fill you in on everything that I've been too busy to fill you in on before.

Let's begin with the most exciting of all news I have to share with you.

I had a few stressful weeks near the end of my clinical rotations. I stayed up late and finished my reports the weekend before the case study presentation was scheduled to be presented. Saturday night [err, Sunday morning] I was up until 5 am getting work done. Sunday night [and again I say, err, Monday morning] I was up until 2 am. Yes, I procrastinate but the second night I vowed to make Mom's almond coffee cake for the dietitians in accompaniment of them sitting through a likely boring thirty minute case study presentation. My point being - I finished the presentation at 11 and THEN made the cake and showered. I didn't entirely procrastinate.

I have come to find that the library is my biggest ally in getting things done. I lived there last weekend in preparation for the presentation and report and I can happily go back later when I know I want to get down to business. I also just thoroughly enjoy getting lost in the library and finding nooks and crannies where I can sit alone and study or nap or just escape.

My paper, when complete, was 50 pages long not including the research articles I had to add as well and any documentation of my work at the hospital. A full half inch binder [or is it a full inch, I don't really remember] was full to the brim.

I unfortunately did not take a picture of the coffee cake, I was in a hurry to get out the door and had enough struggling to get the cake to carefully fall out of the bundt pan and keep some semblance of presentation alive, as long as I didn't drop the cake from the parking lot the block over from the hospital [which, since I know you were worried for me, I did not do, success!].

The presentation went well for the most part and I was happy to be done with that day. The work was over and I could just enjoy my last week there where needed - which happened to be every floor and unit in the hospital including home visits to certain patients. You want to talk about interesting, eh? Home visits can range from disgusting to enlightening and enjoyable. We'll just leave it at that, how about?

And now to semi-change the subject:
My last day at the hospital I was waiting at a a light I frequently wait at a few minutes from where I park. Normally I am in a hurry to get there with enough time to run the distance from car to office door, but today I was far less stressed. I was nearly free of the morning alarms and free labor I was providing. Don't get me wrong, I really enjoyed my time at the hospital, especially with the people I became well acquainted with, but I was relieved that this was it. So, I digress.

As I was waiting at the always-long light I stared at the birds that congregated in the thousands on the telephone wires that hung above my head. Had it not been light out I would have expected them to look like bats circling around in the sky. But alas, they're just birds.

If you've ever seen the Pixar short "For the Birds" you might be aware of what I'm getting at here - they circle around overhead, land on the wire ever so precisely, and force the others around them to shimmy down the wire. Sometimes they aren't let in and once again circle overhead before landing in a less crowded spot or the edge of the group. They almost look like a big group of women, huddling close to share gossip, when in actuality there is nothing really to gossip about, just noise to be heard. No wonder men find women confusing.

Now, it's just a downward slope to graduation and off to the real world I suppose, whatever that may be, whenever that may happen.

Topic 3:
What with the almond cake presentation and the last day thank you cookies I have come to terms with the fact that when feeding myself I generally go for convenience and when cooking for others my self restraint and joy in preparing increases tenfold. Food really is an expression of love to others, "I took the time [a hot commodity] to make you this so that even for a brief moment the process of eating this makes your senses go on a cruise and the corners of your lips turn up." Really, any excuse for baking is good enough for me. This seems a bit off considering I'm studying to tell people not to eat too many decadent foods, but sometimes you just want something rich.

Cooking is both an art and a science. The art is all in the creativity. Making simple ingredients into masterpieces. And there's the science, why does salting vegetables make them "sweat? [think osmosis]" Why does garlic chopped smaller have a more potent garlic flavor than a whole clove [greater surface area]? Food science and culinary concoctions really must go hand in hand, whether you think it through that way or not. Those questions can all be answered in the same way that certain methods of cooking just makes things taste better - hand-in-hand I tell you.

Unfortunately, I'm not one for presentation. As long as it tastes good I don't much care how it looks. That's for detail oriented people...and I'm not one of them.Baked salmon with roasted peppers, onions, green beans and salad served over 7 grain pilafCheesy scrambled eggs with sauteed onions and peppers

Don't forget your appetite for life! sylyb.

2 Weeks...But Who's Counting?

So close...and yet so much to do until rotations are over!

sylyb

Procrastination is the Thief of Time

If you can make it through the video you deserve a round of applause. If you're looking for the funniest part it's probably somewhere between 5:17 and 6:05...just sayin'

Who can understand what she's saying in the majority of that song anyway? :)

Moments

Sometimes we take for granted how precious life really is, how everything can hang in such a delicate balance and the plan we have set out for us is constantly being shifted based on the changes we make, the choices we choose. But more than that, I'm thinking about capturing and holding on to the moments we don't mind to just let slip by.

Every time I hear "Jack and Diane" I think about the line where he says

Hold onto sixteen as long as you can,
Changes come around real soon,
Make us women and men

Oh yeah life goes on,
long after the thrill of livin' is gone
Oh yeah they say life goes on,
long after the thrill of livin' is gone

And that leads me to some questions in my life -

When does the joy of living go away, when you get a real person job or have sixteen year old children of your own? Does the thrill of living have to go away? When is the moment when life becomes passe?

If that is the case I suppose I'd rather get every opportunity to living in as long as I can. I don't want to settle with life and realize that the joy I have for it is gone because it IS a gift that is so precious. Despite the mundane things in life we all must learn to live with, I have no intention of losing my appetite for living --- ever. Cynics and pessimists be damned.

Life is about the people that you form relationships with, the encounters you make, the difference you evoke on the world. Life truly is a gift and I don't want to come to the conclusion one day that I no longer like where I'm sitting. I want that same zest for life that I had when I was six years old and everything was new and exciting. I want to forever look at the world with the sense of excitable anticipation for the encounters I may embark on.

On that note -
I spent the weekend with some friends I've made while here in Oklahoma. I successfully, however tired, experienced the rivalry that is OU vs Texas in the flesh.

Thanks to Jeff, Kelly, Ideen, and Monica for making this a fun weekend.

BOOMER...

Welcome to My Hospital

It's always a rush to walk the block over from where I park my car to the hospital entrance. Being that my punctuality [cough, or lack thereof] gets me at my desk at 8:00 every morning, I am always in a rush, half winded when I walk the 9 flights up the steps because nothing is slower than waiting on an elevator.

So in my rush every morning I have come to make some conclusions about the area I work in.

The wind whistles through the spaces between the cars as they pile into their slots, which of course are few and far between even at 7:45. That early in the morning there are workers trimming bushes and mowing lawns. As you walk between those buildings you smell the cut grass and the small wildflowers sprouting up between the cracks of the sidewalk.

As you approach the entrance to the hospital, even before 8 am, men with walkers and wheelchairs line up on the balcony gripping tightly to their cigarettes leaving a scent of smoke wafting through the air.

Getting through the lobby where patients wait for their prescriptions is an ordeal. Stagnant and hot humid air circles around the lobby and conversations mix and muddle with the television shows that play while patients wait.

People move quickly, slowly, some without any specific location in mind, others wait for someone to wheel them to their next donation. I weave in and out between people to make my way to the stairwell nearest my office door. Construction workers scoop, tinker, and build to create a new wing on the hospital.

By the time I reach my floor I am out of breath and the nape of my neck is damp with sweat. And that's just the beginning...

Do note:
1. If you are a woman you will be hit on - can I get your number? You're 74, no!
2. No one will agree on the food.
3. You're bound to do inpatient, outpatient, and any other little thing...in one day
4. Expect anything, you'll work hard and see a lot of different things.
5. Prepare to write and be ULTRA prepared for any work in the country.

Just Another Rainy Sunday

I love the rain, I love it especially at home when the thunder echos in the cul-de-sac. Outside of this week, it has been a long time since rain hit Oklahoma soil. And it suits my mood today just fine.

I woke up with the light streaming in the window praying that it would be overcast and that I could open the windows and breathe in fresh air, keep my air conditioning off, and find some glimmer of fall weather in the breeze. God knew, and my prayers were answered. I could pray for another three day weekend but I won't press my luck.

Overall, this weekend went by like a dream. I slept a good portion of it away and did little in the area of productivity. Friday night I turned off the lights, danced around the apartment and hopped in the stopped up shower with a few candles lit and let the heat surround me [simple pleasures]!

Completing this next week of clinical rotations I will be more than half way done. I made it this far, look out floor coverage here I come [mind you I'm saying this in the most feeble tone possible].

Football season has started as you all know. For me, that means an empty church parking lot to pull into on Saturday evenings. You're always aware of when a home OU game takes place simply by the number of parishioners attending services on Saturdays. And yes, I am aware they love their football down here, and yes I am aware of who Sam Bradford is....now. Don't judge me!

There's a pot of chicken vegetable soup I concocted on the stove simmering and an empty bed that's calling my name. Mellow music is drowned out by the sound of thunder and rain coming through the open windows and I am lethargic but entirely too happy. No worries, tomorrow will ruin it all [Mondays inevitably always do]. Until October 22nd, which I have declared to be the BEST day of 2010, I will slave away at the hospital learning necessary tools to help me practice and pass my boards early next year.


Today's:
Choice websites to waste time on:
http://www.apartmenttherapy.com/
which subsequently led me to --
http://www.stormthecastle.com/terrarium/
http://www.facebook.com/
http://www.thekitchn.com/

Choice song:
Heartbeats - Jose Gonzalez

See you. love you. bye

Claddagh

I do not fancy myself much for excessive jewelry. I couldn't tell you a thing about accessorizing properly and I don't much mind that [it is far less expensive]. I am however, somewhat envious when other people day in and day out manage to look put together and show up to places on time. This feat is virtually impossible in my book. Truth be told, I will never be a punctual person and I'm okay with that...I just work a little harder to get to places on time compared to those perpetually punctual.

However, I'm getting away from the point of this post. I've been thinking a lot about my time here in Oklahoma as the days get shorter and the months fly by [No, I do not know what I am doing with my life, I'm trusting that the plan will simply unfurl itself in some cosmically awesome way...did you hear that God? Cosmically awesome, as in hit me over the head with it because I probably won't notice otherwise. I can be a bit oblivious after all]. It will be nearly November by the time I am finished with clinical rotations and that means just about a month to simply be Mara the Grad student once again. And oh, how I have savored those moments of simply 'being' [mostly by the pool].

I am not entirely sure on God's intent for sending me to Oklahoma. I understand that I needed these experiences to become an RD and I understand that I have blossomed more into the person I was meant to be having come down here on my own. Maybe it was the friendships I've made or the experiences I've gotten to partake in [both within the internship and well outside of it].

What I do know is this, all those people that told me I'd find myself a cowboy were wrong. Of course, I knew that from the get-go. I'm not here to get my M.R.S. degree I'm here for my Masters. I am happily single, it always struck me as odd when people ask if I have a boyfriend and I respond that I don't. In their mind they either have someone lined up or they ask me why not? "Well thank you for pointing that out. I didn't realize!" Being single is not a curse by any means, unless you're an old hag. I like being single because I can focus on me, I don't have to worry about what he's doing or what his plans are. I don't have to work twice as hard to keep two schedules in order. I have difficulty enough keeping my friends' schedules in line. However, as happy as I am, and that being said I would like to send a message out to my husband - wherever he is, whenever I meet him.

Dear You,

I'm patiently preparing myself for the day we meet. I'm working on making myself the best spouse that I can be and I hope and pray that you are too. Know that I think about you often and pray for your safety. I love you very much and I know that some day when the timing is JUST right, God will send you to me. Or maybe he'll send me to you. Either way, I anticipate our life together because we are playmates and partners in crime; we are friends and we are better together than we are apart.

Love, Me

P.S. You're sure to never be bored as we're on an adventure in this life together and I know I am a handful [just ask my parents]. I'm glad we can share in our appetite for life!

P.P.S Please know what the claddagh is and make sure that you take it seriously because I wear it with pride and it is a beautiful symbol. Also, I expect you to flip it at some obscure moment in our courting [yes, courting].

P.P.P.S. kloveyoubye

sylyb

You Don't Know

Fifteen Things You're Likely Not to Know About Me...Unless You Do
[and then I'm sorry you're rereading it]

1. Bill Cosby puts me in stitches
2. I have had plastic surgery on my ear twice
3. For a brief period in time I wanted to be the following:
meteorologist, teacher, marine biologist, one of the Price is Right women. Another period in time I wanted to own a restaurant called Flowers and Frosting [copyright pending]. If a photographer got in on that act we'd also be Fotos...I'm so clever
4. Potty humor is never NOT funny; $&%@ is my favorite cuss word.
5. I'd never been to a county fair until after my senior year in high school
6. I'm an art kid at heart. I've gone through my stints of knitting [remedial kid style], mod podge [love that!], would be photography, painting, knick knack making, redo my room "Trading Spaces" style, jewelry making, scrap booking. Really, there's no point in going on because you get the point. Currently on my videography kick.
7. Took piano lessons for 12 years
8. I write poetry...and you're likely never to read it
9. My spice rack is alphabetized, my closet is [kind of] color and seasonally arranged, my bed never needs made because it never gets un-made [except when the clothes pile up].
10. I love vacuuming and despise dusting
11. I'm according to my IgE test, severely allergic to dust mites. Thank you antihistamine.
12. Which reminds me, I sneeze really weird
13. Despite my one month bout in Chicago [which doesn't really count in my book] I've only ever lived in states that start with the letter "O"
14. I'm an INTP or INTJ. I was on the bubble. Look that up in your Funk and Wagnalls!
15. I have 34 first cousins...and it's awesome.

Sweet Tooth

About three hours ago [5:30] I sat at my dining room table eating my pepper jack Tuna melt and wished the evening away. And by that, I mean I wished it were bedtime.

I am by no means a lousy morning person, but if it were up to me, I'd be able to sleep until 10 each and every day. Call me lazy, I don't mind much, I know the power of a good long night's sleep. And so I have been waiting for the sun to go down since I arrived home. Funny how I should act such a way. I'll be thrilled when Friday arrives and I will have completed my first FULL week of clinicals.

In other news, I must share with you that in preparation for going to bed I took my contacts out early on in the evening to give my eyeballs a rest, all that chart work can really take it out of you!

I wrote my first clinical note as a Dietetic Intern today and saw patients on my own, not in a mock trial, not with the intent of getting a passing grade in my Medical Nutrition Therapy course, but to prepare myself for the work force, EEK!

Beyond that, as any good procrastinator does, I visited one of my most favorite time wasting sites [http://www.apartmenttherapy.com/]. It sucks you in with the colorful pictures and links to other wonderful time wasting sites. Beyond that, with my multitude of other locations to waste time [i.e. youtube, facebook, awkwardfamilyphotos] I finally arrived at a suitable enough time to think about going to bed.

While I was browsing, I should mention I saw the best idea for organizing in a kitchen that I have come across in some time. I've included that picture for you above.

While wasting time, I let my stomach do the talking [post tuna melt and blueberry muffin], as it all too often does. Notice Exhibit C, a concoction I perfected at home with the 'rents. I caved last night at the grocery store when I saw Redi Whip [which I have not yet purchased since I've moved to Oklahoma] staring at me through the glass doors. I had to give in, if for nothing else, than for the satisfaction of creating this picture.

I should also mention, this is the second night in a row I've allowed myself to succumb to its call. Better fruit and whipped cream than the Nilla Wafers I munch on or the Fudge Bars in the freezer. If nothing else, my apartment is stocked with enough sweets to administer to any girl experiencing PMS for at least 4 months. I just wish that could be my excuse for my sweet tooth right now.

No matter, the Wellness Center is open late tomorrow!

Until we one-way-chat-again enjoy the rest of your week! See you. Love you. Bye

Clinicals

Clinicals starts tomorrow. That is all I've got to say about that.

The end of my summer and the beginning of the rest of my nutrition career. Here we go, we're on the cusp of it. Wish me luck, say a prayer, here we go.

Camp

What another disappointingly long stretch without writing. I apologize.

I was fortunate enough to weasel my way into going to Camp Endres [http://ideaboxstudio.com/dsok/camp.html]. Being that I was intended simply to be an alternate in case another intern got sick I decided to attend the orientation meeting and ask if I could be of any service since I believed the experience to be worthwhile. Boy, was I right. Thankfully, they asked me to help out with arts and crafts: the best of both worlds, a learning experience and making crafts with kids. The camp went from a Saturday until the following Saturday.

On the downside I wasn't able to attend mass [which was pointed out to me by the older gentleman I always sit near the following mass], being that this experience was worth it though, I'm going to assume God found me in the right on this one. I hope at least.

The camp is run by a non-profit organization that caters to children with Type 1 Diabetes. For me, it was a chance to understand how, as a future dietitian, my knowledge can really assist people with diabetes.

So here are some of the things I did while I was there:
1. Counted carbohydrates
2. Made awesome new friends...awesome!
3. Played in a pond
4. Watched a nurse assist someone with a seizure
5. Inserted my own injection site where a pump would attach
6. Shot myself up some saline [in place of insulin]
7. Danced myself sweaty
8. Taught a nutrition education session
9. Played Art Teacher
10. Experienced nature in a different part of Oklahoma

The list goes on and on...

And in thanks for having had such an excellent experience I'll close with this excerpt from the book An Altar in the World by Barbara Brown Taylor, given to me by Hannah:

"...As with Jacob, most of my visions of the divine have happened while I was busy doing something else. I did nothing to make them happen. They happened to me the same way a thunderstorm happens to me, or a bad cold, or the sudden awareness that I am desperately in love. I play no apparent part in their genesis...talk myself out of living in the House of God.
Or I can set a little altar, in the world or in my heart. I can stop what I am doing long enough to see where I am, who I am there with, and how awesome the place is. I can flag one more gate to heaven- one more patch of ordinary earth with ladder marks on it - where the divine traffic is heavy when I notice it and even when I do not. I can see it for once, instead of walking right past it, maybe even setting a stone or saying a blessing before I move on to wherever I am due next."

I guess for me, you always realize your blessings and thank God in hindsight. I'll forever be playing catch up thanking the Big Guy. I am terribly thankful I got to experience camp and meet the people there that I did. I had hit my middle of the internship wall and that was just what I needed to be rejuvenated to experience all I can while I'm here in Oklahoma.

Until next time friends....

sylyb.

TOMS

I feel the need to share my immense joy in a purchase I just made today. TOMS, as you may or may not know is a business that sells shoes. For every pair you purchase another is sent to a person in a Third World country that needs a pair as well. On a separate note, they're cute and comfortable and if I had enough money I'd probably buy a pair of wedges too. But alas, as my budget really shouldn't call for these even. I splurged with what is left of my birthday money [that I didn't use for groceries or textbooks] to get this pair.

http://www.toms.com/

I'm enthused, can't you tell?


And if that weren't enough I'm showing you firsthand what a week long diabetes camp, where everyday you play with kids at the pool sort of tan line looks like [and this is after me working on fixing it]. Oh well, I suppose I can at least say I've gotten sun this summer. It's sad really, I don't want skin cancer and I use a daily SPF but you cannot escape the sunshine when you're out in it every day...that and it's hard not to want to be in the pool when you have one in your apartment complex and it is generally over 100 easily.



So I'm off to another Diabetes camp, and hopefully I can work on evening out my sweet tan lines with more watching campers in the water. Oh, who am I kidding, I'll be playing with them.

In other news, one of the interns has a jeep. In our drive to get some pizza [http://www.thewedgeokc.com/]
I rode in the back seat with the top down. Summer bliss at it's best. Ahh :)

I miss you all so very much!

Sunday

Today I got lost somewhere in my apartment. I did nothing of consequence, spent time on absolutely nothing productive. I put on Pandora and wasted the day with the sunlight streaming in through the blinds. If it were interesting enough to make a video montage you'd see a lot of eyes closed and dirty dishes on the counter. I refused [or rather forgot] to turn on my phone until after 2 and have yet to get out if my pajamas.

And this reminds me, I recently saw on facebook that Michael successfully managed to stay shirtless all day. That would be more impressive if he got out of bed before 3 [which I'm betting was the case].

For those of you who are unable to relax and get comfortable [believing myself talented at the art of doing nothing, procrastinating, watching the branches sway and the light change in the sky] you should really take a cue from Michael, he's amazing at relaxing.

In other news, as the family continues to transition in life Mom and Dad are down another sibling as Nicholas has moved off to continue his education. Michael will be moving out soon enough to start with school but then Nathan will be back during his monthly rotations and I'll be back to get my life in order. A family of transitions, always.

Driving

Life has gotten a bit busy again as you may have noticed. What with classes that are a week long and an overnight Diabetes Camp in BFE, Oklahoma I've had little time to update you all on life as we know it in Oklahoma.

My most recent week long class that ended was my Nutrition Assessment. This included a test that reviewed all of my MNT [Medical Nutrition Therapy]. Medical Nutrition Therapy, in my opinion, is the heart of clinical nutrition. It is also not my strong suit. This adds to my anxiety on performing well during my clinical rotation. Thankfully, I passed the test and can continue on with my academia and start clinicals [not passing the test would have required I stay an additional semester and push back my clinical experience].

I've also completed my Sports Nutrition course and Pediatric/Prenatal Nutrition. Unfortunately, I would have enjoyed those classes as semester long experiences but you can't be choosy when you finish your masters in a year.

The Diabetes camp was a great experience. Unlike most of the rotation sites we do we were all together. 8 girls that have spent the past six months getting to know each other really well and you've got a recipe for? Laughter. And laughing really is the best.

On the way back from the Diabetes after I napped and as I was lounging in the "mom van" I felt an overwhelming sense of the present moment. This is what movie makers strive to evoke in people as they watch movies. Life, living. Let me paint you the picture.

The air doesn't work so the windows are rolled down and the breeze is whipping through your hair. Sweat is rolling down your back but you've become accustomed to far worse heat in the past week so the breeze ruffling through your shirt sleeve is like heaven. The moon is half full and shining in the window and not a cloud is in sight. People are talking in the front seat but their words are indistinguishable between the whipping wind and the music on the radio. The country music is playing and all you can think is "summertime." Your skin is tanned from playing at the pool and running around outside. You're exhausted but in the best way possible. This my friend is perfection...pure perfection. A lazy drive in the summertime.

Enjoy your summertime. No, really, enjoy it. Don't just live in it, love it. Embrace the moment. I'm thinking this may be one of my last lazy sort of summers. So please, enjoy every minute you've got.

Video Mania

Independence Day

To live with the wide eyes of a five year old. Excitement and innocence. This is what fireworks make me think of.

I love this holiday so much, so, so very much. Something about listening to the patriotic music and the food you eat, the people you spend time with. This is America. This is my country, this is my pride for the country.

I would like it to be put on the record here the following information:

My future husband, wherever you may be, whenever I will meet him should know that I fully intend to marry as close to this holiday as possible. That is how much I love this day.

To those of you I could not spend time with on this holiday, I hope you had a wonderful day. Fellow patriots [:)] enjoy the last hour of the day you have until next year.

Happy Birthday USA!

Up and Coming

To keep you updated on the news of my continuing adventures in OKC:

I begin back at school tomorrow. Classes are set up a bit differently, which makes graduating with a masters degree possible in a year along side an internship. I'll be starting with Sports Nutrition tomorrow. The class begins at 9 and does not end until 5:10 in the evening. This is how the month of July will go for me, a new class each week.

Along with those I'll be getting some community hours working a Diabetes camp and learning about what will be tested over during my boards exam.

I'd like to just be done with the process and moving on. And although that sounds terrible, I realize I am wishing something bittersweet. I have met wonderful people here in the program and am learning a lot about myself, especially living alone. Wishing to be done would mean wishing I were home and away from them all. I feel as if I have been building to the moment when I'll become licensed and registered for so long that it seems it will never come.

I've also come to the realization today that although I am single I am in no mood to find someone I can settle down with. Having seen several pregnant people, new parents, or recent newlyweds I realize that once you find the person you'll raise a family with does not mean your problems end; you simply acquire a different set of problems.

In other news, there is a thunderstorm outside. I usually am excited to see them but since I live in Tornado Alley instead of listening on the front porch I worry about tornadoes and hail damage. One less thing I'll have to worry about when I get home.

So I'm getting back into the grind of things with classes [enjoyed my break away from everything THOROUGHLY] but will be happy to continue rolling through things to finish up. I'm not one for growing up, but I am one for moving on when its necessary.

Until I type again, I miss you all. Love you lots.

P.S. I saw Toy Story 3 and loved it. Pixar really knows their stuff [and obviously, I'm a life long fan of anything Disney].

10 of My Philosophies

1. Dessert every day means not feeling deprived. Today I had a cupcake, yesterday I had a fudge bar, the day before a can of peaches. This only works if you're maintaining your weight and not working toward losing it. Then I totally suggest having your dessert one day a week. And yes, that's my professional opinion.
2. Praying when I think I'm about to get lost always calms me down to a point where I eventually find an area I've seen. When all else fails, I pull out my trusty Garmin, Joe.
3. In reference to the above GPS with the name, giving names to objects and nicknames to people makes them more personable. Just ask Pope Benny or Betty, my car.
4. You can wear anything you want as long as you're confident enough in it. Attitude is everything; keep it positive. When all else fails, you probably have the wrong size...or the manufacturing company decided not to have you in mind that day.
5. I love calling myself an Earth Muffin, it even makes me FEEL greener. Keep those reusable bags in the car so you don't forget to take them with you. Those excess plastic bags are evil.
6. Discovering new music is one of my favorite things. But then, so is stargazing, swimming, playing board games, and on and on. Savor the little things always.
7. Vacuuming the carpet makes the apartment look clean, despite how messy everything else sometimes is. It's those special carpet lines!
8. Focusing your energy on something is therapeutic whether that be yoga :) painting, writing poetry, or cooking.
9. Keeping up with the Jones-es, keeping up with appearances, keeping up with fashion is exhausting.
10. Flowers are not overrated, neither is old fashioned chivalry or romance. If only the majority of the male population agreed with me.

My Hobby: Organizing

Coincidentally, my friends I've made here at the internship are all gone somewhere else for the time being so I've determined to occupy my time doing other assorted goodies [none of which will further my educational career].

One of the things I did was to check out books on organizing at the local public library. There is something so magical about organizing that I get excited just thinking about the possibilities of a clean space. Much in the same way, I was thrilled to have my own one bedroom apartment knowing I could keep it exactly as I wanted it. My spice shelf is alphabetized, my TV stand has all components "just so" and the list continues on.

Beyond keeping my apartment immaculate [for the most part] I have been thinking about my return home. I'll be merging all my relatively new purchases back in with the family's stuff. Having seen the state of our storage room I have no idea where it will all fit. It's not Mom and Dad's fault, it is the sheer fact that they will never be empty nesters as their children continue to acquire more things and leave them at the house while we gallivant off doing our own things. Four children in four states with four sets of bedroom furniture, and so on and so on. But I digress.

And so, I am putting it here for you all to see and hold accountable for [wait 'til Mom and Dad see this]. Drum roll please...

By Klutter Kloset next Spring I intend to not only have my bedroom organized and rid of "junk" but also the rest of the house, excluding my three brothers' rooms of course considering its their mess and I'm not going through their closets. My parents however, need someone as, eh hem [wink wink], motivated as myself to let go of things that don't need to be kept.

I get it honestly, I will admit that. I keep a good number of things simply because they might get use at some point, they were a gift and therefore a social contract to keep said item until who knows when, they have sentimental value [or do they?]. Having gone through some of these books I have determined that really, what we need to do is not reorganize the clutter but remove the clutter and decide what is most important to keep around.

I've already started thinking about things in my closet and things I banished to the basement. That Halloween night light I made in Girl Scouts, do I really want to keep that when I'm a mom myself? Are the 2nd grade religion books really necessary to keep around? What about the clothes I haven't worn in years? How about nick-nacs that I used to like but don't have a taste for anymore? Let's not even get started on the school notes and magazines I felt compelled to keep or the Nsync paraphernalia shoved under my bed.

Laugh it up because you're laughing for one of two reasons
1. you're nothing like this and find it funny that such items weren't trashed without batting an eye

-or-

2. you are the exact same way as myself and my fellow pack rat parents.

My deadline [barring any complications from home, like oh, say, another rotator cuff surgery that keeps some random mom incapable of using her right hand for 12 weeks] will be May 1st. That gives me plenty of time to study and pass my Boards exam [and who knows whatever else my life will do] as well as motivate my parents before Michael moves back home from his freshman year in college with his acquired stuff.

Out with the useless...in with the fresh start and new attitude!

s.y.l.y.b

Big Girl Experiences are Overrated

Thrilled [well no] to get to experience a life lesson on being a "big girl." Yes, that's right, my car decided it was ca-put and needed a new battery. Since yesterday I had plans of being productive it put quite the damper on myself, and two of my support system friends here in OK. With their help I was able to get a battery replaced in my car and complete my necessary tasks for the day [getting my ID badge for a rotation site and buying groceries since I didn't have them]. Thankfully they were available and only the battery [knock on wood] was the culprit.

To top off that outstanding day I thought I was about to have a late charge on my internet bill. I'm so smart I'm dumb however because I had set up to pay the bill before I left to go home those glorious two weeks ago now.

Life happens, I guess that's all I can say with this one. Life happens and there isn't much to do but laugh it off.

To finish off my night I ended up fixing myself a healthy dinner but negated it by finishing off a carton of full fat peanut butter chocolate oatmeal ice cream. And if you're wondering it's called Monster Something Something and it is delicious. I have vowed to go to the work out center on campus today so I don't feel like a fatty.

Beyond that today I am "detoxing" with water and only the healthiest of foods. However since the AC is set to come on at 80 and it's currently 93, humid and sunny out, I'm having to replenish my sweat that I cannot get rid of. Luckily, since I have not showered yet today and didn't yesterday my hair, being that it is the essence of grease is staying very much out of my face and off my neck pulled into a hair tie.

So to my fellow water chuggers SALUTE*!

*For more ways to say cheers click salute above.

"Post Road" Downs [aka the Funk]

I holed myself up today. Stayed in my pajamas, ate ice cream straight out of the carton, put on mellow music, did nothing worthwhile even though there's plenty to do. Today was a day of loafing around. Loafing and loathing.

I touched back down on Oklahoma soil yesterday to two eager friends and while I was happy to see them I could not cover my disappointment about leaving home, my family. I didn't cry at all, it did not seem fitting.

I sat down on my couch when I arrived to my apartment. I had never felt so alone but I could not bring myself to do anything but sit and stare. I sat while a storm raged until the middle of the night or more. And when I had sufficiently sat I laid in bed and listened to the rain and watched the lightning flicker.

I'm having a six month wall, a middle of the year funk here during my internship. I knew I would be sad to leave my family which is why I had a small stint of sadness, MY version of CSNY's Pre-Road Downs. I knew I would be this way when I returned.

I'm hoping that once classes start back up [and once I'm used to clinical rotations] I'll get back into the swing of things, I'll slap myself across the face and act like a big girl. Preparing for the real world, such a scary concept. Then again, I was never a "13 going on 30" type. So I'm going to take a bath and shake off this feeling and hopefully accomplish something productive until bedtime.

Miss you. Love you. Bye

Youngs Jersey Dairy

Graduation

Graduation. The end. No... the beginning.

If I had the mentality about high school and college that I do now, just fresh a year out and working on my masters, I might have done some things different.

High school flies by so quickly, and while I have no desire to live those four years over, they were four years that helped to shape me for the person I am today. I strengthened friendships and made lifelong ones in the process. If I HAD to do it all over again, I'd probably have spoken my mind more to more people, been more proud to call myself an active Catholic [I still wear my Kairos cross proudly], and I would have looked to gain more experiences while I was living at home.

I could say the same thing for college too, especially my first semester there. That semester is a blur looking back. I was living day to day just trying to cope with being away from my family, best friend, then boyfriend, and the routine and life I loved. It's funny how you go from set schedules in high school to college where they prepare you for a career that revolves around schedules. Most times college is the most out of flux you'll ever be. No routine, no set schedule, eating habits changed [I would think about that, now wouldn't I?], new people in a new place, the list goes on and on. But I digress.

Michael is newly graduated with a fresh start and open doors ahead of him. He deserves all the best things life can offer and God has a wonderful plan for him. Along with my older two brothers, I pray for him fervently to be where he is meant in life and to get the most out of it. I wish I could pass on to him the knowledge that I gained while away from home [even in Oklahoma I continued to learn]. And beyond that, I wish I could give him the courage to step out and shine his light brightly because he has a bright light. Because he IS a bright light. Because he is my brother and I love him so dearly.

Michael-

I am proud to call you my brother, I am proud to be your older sister and I wish all the best things from you. I love you terribly, terribly much and miss you while I'm away.
Expect a graduation gift in the future, I have to think of something totally awesome and quirky enough. And just remember, this is the beginning, your attitude is everything, and you have all the tools you need to succeed. I'll be here when you need me and I'd love to get random text messages, voice-mails, and phone calls from you whenever you need my advice or just to shoot the ****.

Onward

I will be forever fascinated by the sight of teeny buildings and tiny toy cars. Forever five years old. Forever fascinated with the world, wide eyed and craving more and more.

I've always like flying, most times the lull of the engine puts me to sleep. Today I was out before we took off the ground. The people I sit next to probably think I'm a bore, maybe they're relieved they don't have to talk.

Never have I been more excited to see green grass, trees, and brown dirt, or land back in my home state. Oklahoma isn't a bad place to live, but it is by no means home. And I may not end up here my whole life but it will forever be my home and the place I love most.

I was so excited to give hugs when I saw everyone and was even more thrilled to realize it wasn't just Dad picking me up, but everyone. They all came! I am going to savor these moments with my family and the dog while I'm with them.

The Evolution of a Roadtrip

Not the most poetic but, nonetheless all I can think to tell you about in this blog on the trip!

I woke up this morning and realized I was in my own apartment. It took me about two full seconds to realize that my road trip companions weren't in the bathroom, weren't eating breakfast, and weren't going to be strolling through the door. It wasn't a dream; the road trip is over.

So here I am sitting on my bed, reliving the memories I so recently created and I find myself with a twinge of depression. The months of planning this trip are now done. The memories have been made and I won't be able to just drive west any time soon. My excursion is done but my appetite for adventure has not been satiated.

I believe that each trip we take, literal or otherwise changes us. Looking at me you'd see nothing different. Yes, I'm technically a year older [having had my birthday on the road]. Yes, my skin is a little bit more brown than before I left and yes, I have 5 gb of pictures and video on my camera [what can I say I love photography and making montages] but I don't seem any different.

My car has a few more miles on it [4100+] and I managed to put a grapefruit sized dent in the back bumper [those rocks in Yosemite are tricky] but other than that, it too is the same.

So if I haven't look like I've changed and my surroundings are the same then why do I feel unsatisfied to be sitting here telling you about my trip? Maybe the 'travel bug' bit harder this time than I expected. I can't sit here and complain though, that would be selfish, and eventually we all have to come back to bills, junk mail, school emails, and the ever present tuition fees. My list of things to complete in the next week is already longer than I wish it to be and my motivation to complete it has never been so low.

But I know what you really came here to hear about is how the trip went and see some pictures. The video and pictures will be up soon. For now you'll just have to sit through the stories as I recollect them.

Sunday May 9th - Sunday May 23rd

I decided not to pack anything or get any of the food I would be preparing for the trip together until Sunday because I knew I'd be impatient to leave. Of course, with so many things to do I ended up slightly frazzled before I went over to pick up my tripmates. I was only a half hour later than expected and for me, that's pretty good. Monica and I had to wait on Jessica doing her Mother's Day afternoon shift until 4:30 so we sat impatiently waiting for her. In the moment she returned excitement for the journey grew tenfold and we were off in minutes. Our first stop would be outside of Amarillo to visit Jessica's aunt, a nun. Yes, we stayed at a convent and it was wonderful. Not so surprisingly, we've all stayed at a convent before.

It is so interesting to see how God lives in these women. His love leaks out of them. You can see it in their smiles, in their stories, in the singing, and in their hugs. Before we left the following day I hugged 30 nuns, I am not exaggerating.

Our first big driving day, 12 hours in the car with enough food to feed an army and enough music to last [almost] the whole trip. The scenery changed drastically as we drove out of Texas and through New Mexico and most of Arizona. It was both amazing to see how vast and open the west is and somehow still boring enough to fall asleep for a few hours.

We were heading to Phoenix to visit Marcus and his wife Gina, two people so enamored with life and helping others that knowing them makes you feel more hip. Yeah, that's right, I said hip. They've got the artistic vibe that I believe many people crave but most won't have the gumption to just go after. Trusting in God got them to where they are, in a new area of the country with new plans and a fresh start. Looking back on the trip I realized we stayed with people at all stages of life. Gina and Marcus' stage of life is exciting and inspiring. But that mirrors who they are, exciting and inspiring. Thanking them for letting us invade their lives doesn't seem enough.

So that first day when we got there in the evening we climbed 'A Mountain' [hope that IS that correct name]. The evening sun was setting over Phoenix and all its surrounding towns and we stood at the top of this mountain to look out and watch the last part of the day sizzle away. Planes flew overhead and there was something magical and peaceful about the views.

On this day we hiked up Phoenix's highest peak, Camelback Mountain. It would have been Gina too but their dog, even though full of energy, couldn't manage to climb up the mountain much. Thankfully Marcus had done the hike enough that he knew where we needed to go, especially on the hairier sections nearer to the top.

Climbing up, and even back down got me thinking. My life is a mountain, or at least many things in my life act as such. Starting new things isn't always the most exciting for me, mostly because it takes adjusting. It's funny to think though. I'm the type of person that orders something different on the menu each time [variety is the spice of life] and I went for undergrad to a school no one I knew went to and survived. What makes it funny is that I'm still hesitant toward change. The motto I've created for myself - "Nuttin to it but ta do it" really is fitting. The first step is always the hardest. Okay, back to the mountain metaphor. When you look at a mountain you are about to climb all you see is the peak, the shape it forms in the distance from your view so far below. Imagining yourself at the top seems impossible but that is just an illusion. When you start to take the steps towards things, when you look at the mountain as pieces it is much easier to conquer. Each step counts, they're all important in the 'mountain take-over'. They can be scary but they are always worth it. You can no doubt stumble but you'll make it if you keep moving forward. Eventually you get to the top, sweaty, but the view is what makes the hike so worth it. We could see Scottsdale and Phoenix, Tempe and Glendale, even the Indian Reservation. They seem so small and you wonder how you ever thought twice about giving things a hike. It was worth it. I'd never been a person to take things step by step. I still don't really stress over details, but with the changes in my life this past year you realize that the big picture isn't made fully until you get through the steps that got you there. So I've found my own peak and it seems so high up, but there are still more mountains to conquer.

After that hike a much needed homemade pizza was necessary and boy was it GOOD!

From Phoenix we ventured just a short drive [ha] to Yosemite. Another driving day. This time we made our way to Yosemite National Park [my favorite stop on our trip]. To ensure that we got there in ample time, mostly before dark and the bear boxes were still visible for us to set up camp, we left by 6 a.m. This is a large feat for two girls that are rarely punctual. Of course, wanting to prove to our third party we could get out in time we did it with a few minutes to spare.

Our trio stayed in the Housekeeping Camp [where I am sure I lost a precious life saving wool red plaid blanket]. I digress. The housekeeping camp is located in the valley so our views were amazing. Our cabin was right by the Merced River and we had views of Yosemite Falls and Half Dome from our tent.

We packed enough food to feed an army while we were there so we had a lot of food to munch on [after a long hike we were much like rabid beasts, so that was good]. Note to you the reader, there are small holes in bear boxes that squirrels can nibble through. I only tell you this because we had a hole chewed through in our pasta salad bag that did not come to our attention until after we finished eating. I have not contracted any rodent diseases that I know of...yet.

Let me address to you the importance of pants. No matter what time of year, no matter where you are, pants are always important to pack. Having told my two travelmates that it would be cold at night in our tent [being that the fourth curtained wall did not really block any cold from seeping in] I failed to pack more than a pair of cut off capri sweats. And I don't just mean some cute pair from VS, I mean boys sweat pants that I'm sure were either a hand me up or down from my beloved brothers. Lucky for me my sleeping back and said wool blanket kept me warm. I cannot say the same for Jessica and Monica, they rented blankets at 6 that next morning. Rule: Always, always pack pants. A jacket [which I did have, also comes in handy].

Our first, and unfortunately only, full day at the park we walked the Happy Trail and then the Mist Trail. The Mist Trail included the hike up to Vernal Falls and past that to Nevada Falls. What with it still being May the weather was still a little chilly we tried avoiding the water we came in contact with. I touched it once to know it was indeed very cold.

Not much to say about the views, you'll see the pictures/videos once I get them up. They were breathtaking. It's so nice to feel like you accomplished something, conquered the world.

Our next day [being as sore as we were] we decided to do some easy walking around El Capitan, Half Dome, as well as Bridalveil and Yosemite Falls.

I was sad to leave the shade and comfort of the trees, seeing them reminded me how much I miss them at home. Don't get me wrong, the desert plants in Arizona and New Mexico are fascinating, but I do miss the shade and green. And we all know I LOVE green! We pressed on for our next stop in Fresno to visit a roommate of Jessica's. The park got to keep some of my paint on my back bumper however, when I accidentally backed into one rock to avoid another. I now have a grapefruit size souvenir from the trip! I've never actually fancied myself a good driver so luckily that was our only car issue the entire trip [besides those scary wind noises in Nowhere New Mexico].

There were no shortage of laughs during those few days and the heat was intense compared to the cool weather of Yosemite [and we would find out soon enough LA as well]. We spent our first full day touring wine country in outside of Fresno. I cannot understand how anyone [besides the DD, which was myself] would get out of a wine tour without getting sloshed, and I mean SLOSHED. You think “refined” when you hear wine. Now, what I think of when I hear the words vineyard and wineries I think of sloppy people in decent dress. It was comical, driving through nowheresville California, amidst apricot and orange trees and everything smelled lovely.

We were fortunate enough to stumble upon the owner of the second winery we stayed at. A few of us wanted to see the stock room where things were barreled up [it was also nice and cool in there]. We followed a man who was getting more water to rinse your glasses out with and ended up following him right into the owner. I'm sure Joey loved talking to tipsy 20 somethings for the near hour we had with him. A good Italian man who had his heart set on joining the air force raised two sons with his wife to be grape and wine connoisseurs. He even let us take wine out of the tap before they were placed in the barrel; talk about tasty! We even were able to take a picture with him and our wine glasses.

On one of our other stops I ran into a classmate from my university, which we know is small. He had moved to Fresno after he graduated. I'd just like to know the odds of seeing someone from a school that has 1200 students total. I thought it impossible to really be him and so Jessica decided to whisper his name until he turned around to be sure it was him. Yes, that happened, and yes, it WAS funny.

We spent the next day heading to Millerton Lake outside of Fresno. It was intended to to be a beach day and it turned out to be comical if nothing else. It took us 20 minutes just to decide where we wanted to park ourselves. It made the situation that much more comical. We arrived early and only saw one other person at the muddy watering hole. She brought an over sized rug with her and had skin like leather. Apparently she went there often. Over the course of that morning and afternoon we were attached by bugs, played cards [thankfully we had four people so we could play Euchre], and had our ears overtaken by a large Hispanic group yelling at their dog. “CHICOOOOOO” They also had something that sounded like Spanish Kids Bop. The sun was so warm I ended up drinking practically boiled water and got a stellar [and by stellar I mean awful and funny] back tan; I didn't quite reach every part of my back. So, drinking water it is essential to relieve oneself. Yep, I peed in a muddy half dried up lake and it was awesome.

After we hit up the pool back at the apartment complex [and witness ducks mauling a young mother duck, EVIL] we set off for Los Angeles. Thanks to the working of my mother, we ended up staying with her cousin-in-law in a suburb of LA. That could not have turned out better. It was lovely. The weather on the way there was smoggy, damp, disgusting, and cold and wasn't in the works to let up. Tomorrow would be my birthday I didn't have a good feeling it would turn out quite as I had hoped.

The morning of my birthday we decided to be tourists but since I had no pants we ended up getting awkward stares form foreigners. We paid too much money to see Hollywood Blvd. blocked off for a red carpet event, walked three miles and yet didn't manage to figure out what was so great about the Sunset Strip, got lost too many times, and ended up sitting in the car longer than necessary. Venice Beach, I have decided, is quite possibly the most disgusting place to go [especially when it's cold out]. I'd rather pee in a watering hole than the toilet I had to use there. Skater dudes there are funny to watch fall, the list goes on and on. We ended up going to Joe's Crab Shack for dinner and eating dessert from the Cheesecake Factory. I was happy for the day to end.

The next day we toured Santa Monica and Beverly Hills on our way out of the city. SoCal redeemed itself in them and looking back I wish we had visited the San Fernando Valley, Burbank, Ventura Highway [everything not in downtown LA]. I suppose I'll have to visit it at some other point and avoid all things stereotypical about LA. Yuck.

Our next stop was to Las Vegas to stay at Harrah's. We were upgraded to a suite which we didn't use but it was free. Since we were there midweek it cost us far less than it would have if we were there on a weekend.

I wanted to look presentable in the city of Sin and actually wore makeup and dried my hair. I brought heels to wear. As we rushed to make a showing of Menopause the Musical on the opposite side of the strip I acquired a blister so bodacious we did a video about it. I walked the majority of the strip barefoot [disgusting, no?] and washed them off in the bathroom before the show began. Again, I have no communicable diseases to speak of, as of yet. After the show ended by the time we made it to our restaurant of choice it was 11 p.m. I had only eaten breakfast that day. We were starved. With dinner we had coupons for margaritas. I ate and drank so fast I was uncomfortable by the time I'd gotten into my second drink. Or maybe it was impromptu lap dance from a random shirtless stranger that I received for my birthday [this is me cringing]. We ended up looking at the rest of the strip before heading to bed. Rather tame time in Vegas, again, another taste for something I'll have to go back and explore more.

The next day we took our time lounging at the pool in Las Vegas and driving to Williams, Arizona where we stayed before our hour drive to the Grand Canyon. We ate at Roger's Steakhouse. Their menus were steer shaped pieces of paper [I acquired one for scrap-booking purposes].

The Grand Canyon tour consisted of a small aircraft tour of the canyon, a Native American dance, an open air truck ride to Antelope Canyon to see the artistic work of flash floods, a boat ride down the Colorado River [thank you for the tan!], and finally an RV tour of the canyon's wildlife. FYI, it costs $25 to get into the park for the week. Since our driver would not let us off to take pictures we had to pay that much to simply look down the sides of the canyon. In the end, it was worth it. The whole two days we were there were worth it.

On our way out of the Grand Canyon we decided to go another 100 miles to see the Four Corners. They have a monument. The monument is closed. At least we didn't have to pay $3 per person to view the chain linked fence and pee in their portapotties. By the way, they do have regular toilets there [but were out of our sight because all we saw was a hole in the ground and construction. Needless to say, another funny video was taken to document this historic moment in our trip. What's a few more hundred miles when you drive 4100 anyway.

We stopped in Albuquerque to sleep part of the night before we ended up back at the convent outside of Amarillo the next day.

That last day at the convent we attended mass, had our prayer service, and were prayed over by the nuns. Talk about safe travels back. The time there was peaceful, but I'm still not sure how they were their habits in the Texas heat.

We made it back Sunday night. Two weeks. Gone in a flash. Totally worth it, and luckily UNDER BUDGET!!! I'm ready for another trip, another experience to help open my eyes.


Rules I've learned on this trip in no particular order:
1. 25 Road trip music compilations were a good idea but I could have made ten more and we'd still be repeating. Lesson learned: You drive more miles than expected.
2. Heels are cute but not worth the blisters in Las Vegas when you're hiking down the entire strip to see a show about "the change."
3. No matter the time of year or the weather, bring more than one sweatshirt and pack pants.
4. Sleeping bags are God's gift to campers in Yosemite [even if the zipper breaks].
5. Stop and stare at the stars for as long as your neck holds out when you're in a national park. The view will never be topped.
6. Cheese sticks only hold out only so long before their liquid separates and they must be milked out of their package.
7. Watch out for rocks. Period.
8. Pissing off locals while you're lost in a car is bound to happen. Politely wave and say this Great Escape Motto : "We're not from arouuuuund here" It works most times.
9. Most truck drivers don't want to honk for you, thank those that do with extra flailing of the arms.
10. Even though you may want to, chasing bears is not safe. Keep your 150 feet distance. And yes, I have bear chasing footage.
11. Makeup is never required on a road trip [unless you are in Vegas, then more is necessary]. Showering, too, is not required daily. You're likely to put on dirty clothes anyway.
12. Unless you plan your birthday to a T in the appropriate locations downtown LA is likely to disappoint.
13. Even though one tripmate may consider trees to look similar, Yosemite is much more than a forest. Stay a few days longer and book earlier. I could go back and hike the same thing tomorrow and still be satisfied.