Swaying in the Dark

There's something really satisfying about turning on soft music in the dark and swaying to the beat...or putting on headphones on a long car ride in the late hours of the day and just closing your eyes, and disappearing [obviously, not as the driver].

You know the feeling, everything in the day - good, bad, or otherwise, just melts away and you're lost in the music. You're lost in the mood it evokes, and for that short while you forget everything around you.

I find that Pink Floyd's Dark Side of the Moon is an excellent album to get lost in, but I'm also fond of the somewhat moody Amos Lee, Ray Lamontagne, and Griffin House.

I think it's the perfect simplicity of the words in combination with the intensity in the way it's sung: heartwrenching, heartbreaking, honest. I don't know, but I like it....especially after a rather stressful day.

The problem with technology comes when it stops working. It's hard to do your job when you rely so heavily on something that decided to just quit working today. Yep, our charting system on the computers were down today. And to top it off, they rearranged the way in which we chart our evaluations and plans. I realize this means almost nothing to those of you who don't know what I have to do during the day, but trust me, it's a big old pain in the butt. So instead of having a nice low key Friday [which I tried to ensure yesterday but working a little longer and a little harder] I ended up not being able to look up or chart on any of my patients until two hours before I was supposed to leave.

Needless to say, I'm sitting in the dark listening to above mentioned men...just letting the 40+ hour work week drift off with the setting sun.

Happy Friday all, next week is already February!!! Time flies.

Una Tienda de Campana Pequena

I wish I could learn a new language via osmosis....or hear it in my sleep and wake up more fluent. I realize it's been less than a month but I'm worried I'm not going to remember what I've already learned. I fear that I'm going to wake up more stupid. If only I had learned earlier, or was bilingual to start...life would have been so much easier! And to top it all of, I feel like a weather reporter...you know you're on site of a tropical storm and there is the split screen of the people in the studio too. It always takes the reporter a solid few seconds to respond because there's lag time.........oh yeah, there's lag time all right, my neurons are firing away, a little sluggish, but firing, HA!

Giddy

I know, I know. You've heard me talk about it the last few posts, but I'm still going strong. Yay me!

I've come to several conclusions to change my life starting now. I don't know what exactly it was that sparked me to take a stand for myself and realize my journey with God starts with me. It's not in the search to help someone else [although, that too comes into play]. It starts with getting me in the right place. It starts with getting myself in neutral, in putting myself in a place where I am receptive to what He has to say and be willing to say 'yes' to that [listening skills will have to be put into play here]. And I've got a long way to go yet [yes, I realize that too]. But I have to tell you...last night I was giddy. Smiling like a school girl with big dreams giddy. Giddy with the promise of that terrifyingly wonderful word that is possibility, possibility for tomorrow and the day after that. To prepare myself I'm being proactive today, the only real and tangible piece of time I can count on.

Giddy about what you ask? I spent four hours studying my Spanish. Si, amigos. I want to become fluent in the language. Not just so I can travel, not just so I can open up doors in my career, but to better myself, to make myself a more well rounded individual. And to think, all I needed was a friend to pose the innocent question "If you had the opportunity to learn it, why didn't you?" Because I did have the means and the time to do it and instead I sat at home like a lazy American...Ouch, sometimes the truth is bitter coming out. But, at least I have no pride. And at least I'm doing something about it now. I can't fix not doing it two and a half years ago but I won't regret having started this year.

Secondly, I want to get my body to the place I want it to be [yep, I took my anthropometric measurements on January 2nd]. Not so I can have an enviable body but so I feel confident in myself, and more importantly so I can show God through action I am grateful for the gift of movement and life. Not all people are so fortunate, and some of life's greatest pleasures require only our bodies, running through grass, snow angels in the winter, hide and seek with your nephew, swimming under a waterfall by the side of the road. You get the picture. My body is not simply a vessel to house my soul and the Holy Spirit. It was created by God in His image and likeness, or so Genesis tells us at least. So I vow to walk a little taller and move a little more [even though it is killing my calf muscles right now, I know they'll be happy I set them to work...eventually].

But the one who joins himself to the Lord is one spirit with Him...Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and that you are not your own? For you have been bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body. 
     -1 Corinthians 17, 19-20 NAB

I also know that to better myself I need to financially be stable. Hello IRA, monthly savings, and loan pay offs. Oh, and thanks Mom and Dad for letting me live at home while I get my stuff together [that helps A LOT].

So, yeah, big plans, exciting plans. Yes, life altering scary plans. But if I don't let go of what is stagnant, I cannot proceed with the journey ahead of me. And thank God I've come to this realization at my age, rather than being wistful and in the midst of a midlife crisis.

I am content knowing I am doing something because the little things add up. And because they add up in a big way.

Okay, I promise I will try not to continue gushing over my New Year's Resolution excitement. But I will keep you apprised of the situation. Fair enough?

Diez mil besos. sylyb.

2012

It comes whether you like it or not. It can come without warning, slipping in after the holiday rush has left you exhausted. It comes with anticipation, and occasionally usually it is anticlimactic.

As I've said before [well, maybe not on here...maybe so, I can't remember] I have never been one to be too excited about New Years. But this year? This year is going to be different. Why you ask? Because I've set my mind to making it a year worth remembering.

It seems I always tolerate the new year after it's in swing but it's letting go of the previous year. And don't get me wrong, 2011 was a fantastic year for me, but it's the start of something else. It's the beginning of another journey. And I'm excited. As I said in my previous post, I've got plans for this year, and I'm going to go into it with too high spirits to end up disappointed, and yes, I realize I have set some pretty lofty goals for myself, but I'm sure that if I put my mind to it, I can accomplish them all. Yes, maybe it'll take me a little longer than one year to accomplish everything I've set out to do but I know I can break it down. And more importantly, I know I can get it done if I put my mind to it.

Milestones and Accomplishments to Note in 2011:

• Passed Boards Exam and became an RD
• Went to Florida with the family
• Became an employed and contributing member of society as a clinical dietitian
• Had another birthday/another year older
• Payed off a good chunk of my government loans
• Witnessed births and deaths
• Went to Florida for Nathan's graduation
• Got another stamp in my passport with my biffle, Jessica. Mexico, check, check!
• Gave a pretty wonderful Christmas gift [if I do say so myself]
• Spent New Years with some of my favorite people

So I am grateful for 2011 and look forward to 2012. Get your appetite ready for another full plate of adventure in 2012! It's going to be a good one.

God bless you on your journey in 2012.